Now that we’re two years into the grief journey I feel challenged more to make my daughter’s identity known. I have a great desire for people to understand that she’s not just gone, but that she LIVED.
Day 2: Identity
Her Identity
Sharing the Grief Journey
October is a month of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness. It is a time to reflect on the grief journey and to spread the message that you do not need to grieve in silence or alone.
Last October I participated in a 31 day photo challenge (Capture Your Grief) from CarlyMarie of Project Heal. I am going to join the journey again this month. I will link you to last year’s posts as well. I hope to give insight to what the process looks like one year later. What it looks like after the blessing of a rainbow/redemption baby. I want to give a peek at how ‘normal’ is so greatly misunderstood.
Day 1: Sunrise
We’re now entering the third year of our grief journey. Some things are very different than the early days of loss, but other things are still the same.
I am still not a morning person. However, this September while on vacation on the Outerbanks of North Carolina there were a number of mornings that I woke early to indulge in the peaceful sights and sounds of the sunrise on the beach. It was a chance to reconnect with God in some moments of quiet, when my heart was greatly overwhelmed with Miranda’s birthday that was soon to arrive. It was a chance to escape the ‘busy’ of the hours ahead of us and just BE.
I used those sun-kissed, God-breathed moments to write my daughter’s name and the name of others who are greatly missed and gone too soon. On the final morning the rest of my family joined me and we all enjoyed the amazing view.
If you are on a grief journey (even if your loss was not infant/child loss), I encourage you to participate in this challenge. There is a wonderful opportunity to grow and heal through creativity.
Do you have a creative way in which you process your heart’s emotions? Will you share your ideas with us?
**Capture Your Grief is a 31 day photo challenge created by CarlyMarie. For each day of the month during October (Pregnancy/Infant Loss Awareness) bereaved parents are encouraged to share their journey through photographs as a way to share the healing process. I am participating in this series, but I will also be posting our everyday ‘life’ posts, because our lives are truly a mix of it all. Thank you for your thoughtful understanding while I share my heart and life this month.**
Hello, Stranger!
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Do you know how long it has been since I’ve written? Of course you do! It’s been far too long. It’s about time I break the blog silence, isn’t it?
Well, hello there, stranger. Let’s get reacquainted!
We’ve had a pretty busy few months. Summer came and went with the wind, or so it seems. While I never intended to take a blogging break. It was apparently exactly what I needed. I’ve spent the past few months living our life and trying to cling to the days as they’ve come and gone. We’ve traveled quite a bit this summer and any days spent at home have really been full of laundry, cleaning, organizing, and trying to figure out why those three things need to be repeated as frequently as they do.
Our family went on a beach vacation the first week of September and shortly after coming home we began our new school year. I can hardly believe it, but this year sees me teaching a 6th grader, a 4th grader, a 3rd grader, a 1st grader, a K4 little one, and keeping a very mobile 6 month old entertained! I’ll have a post coming up very soon to tell you all about the tools we’ll be using for this school year.
Want to keep up with us when the blog is quiet?
When things are quiet around here you can usually get filled in on what’s new over on my Facebook page. I also actively post on Instagram, you’re welcome to come follow our adventures over there.
I am also a contributing writer over at the 2:1 Conference blog. Did you realize that there was an encouragement section over there? Be sure to tune in for words of encouragement from the writing team that I am humbled to be a small part of.
What’s coming up?
Friends, I have so much to share with you (and quite a bit of bloggy housekeeping to do).
Remember when we took our family to Disney last fall? I still need to tell you how we survived and ENJOYED our road trip down and back in a big RV, and about how incredibly our time in Disney was blessed.
Back in February, dear friends and family gathered to bless us with a rainbow-baby shower. I can’t wait to finally tell you about the sweet and precious ways they helped me prepare for Annalise’s arrival.
I know you’ve all ‘met’ our Annalise, but I have yet to share more in depth about how her birth went. It was our first hospital birth since our oldest boys, and my first planned induction.
We are quickly drawing near to Miranda‘s 2nd birthday, and I want to express to you what the grief journey looks like now, when two year have passed and a new sibling has joined the family.
…and so much more.
Often when I have a lot to write it is difficult to sift through my thoughts and get posts written, but I’d love to know what you’re looking forward to read about.
If you’ve missed hearing from me, would you take a moment to comment about what you’d like to hear more about?
Another Turn in the Journey
A year ago a malpractice case made the front page of the Baltimore Sun, it played on the nightly news.
Do you remember my post Homebirth and Loss? In it I shared about the medical malpractice case that was all over the news here in MD last June.
In an incredible turn… the decision was OVERTURNED!
The Court of Appeals has heard the information regarding Evelyn Muhlhan’s negligence during Fielding’s labor at home and decided that precluding it from the trial was abuse.
There was a void of evidence that left a logical hiatus in the story because the jury was not allowed to hear what role Midwife Muhlhan’s conduct played.
But, the media is not covering it.
The other night Vince and I read through all 57 pages in the record. We were left in awe. Nothing was left out. The details are disgusting.
Even our complaint against Muhlhan is mentioned (note 14 on page 10).
As hard as it is to read it all, there is peace in knowing that her negligence is getting attention.
Why is this not being brought to the public’s attention?
When will the Maryland Board of Nursing finally complete their investigation? Why is Muhlhan still suspended? What will it take for her license to be revoked?
This September should have been Miranda’s 2nd birthday… maybe by then this chapter will close.
